What a week...

So, I started back at work this week. I have not felt much like writing about it, I've been busy and just wanted some down time for me.

The thing that struck me the most about going back was how normal everything was. It was overwhelming the first day. It was difficult for me to sit in the lunch room while everyone was carrying on with their chatter and laughter. I had purposely got there earlier than others, but it quickly filled up. I had to leave as fast as I could, something not too easy when people are asking how I was as I ran out the door.

I found some comfort (although it came with emotion too) with a few of my collegues. Without too much info, just let me say that others have either come close or actually had to deal with a loss that I could relate to.

It is getting easier as the days go on, though it is just Thursday and I feel like tmr should be Saturday. I have had enough. I need a break.

At my bereavement group this afternoon, we were talking about Mother's day. I hadn't thought of what I was going to do this year at all, although I have another very special baby that I am a mom to this year, even if she is only with us in our hearts. I was thinking that it would be the perfect day to go to the nursey and pick out a pink rose to plant in my garden for Julia.

How are all of you going to spend Mother's day?

There is one last thing I wanted to talk about, and it is the most important. I have a friend who has a friend that just recently learned that her baby (at 21 weeks gestation) will not live. This very day may have been the most difficult in her life. I know she has been on my mind and in my heart all day, hoping that she is doing as well as one can be in her circumstances, that she has received the support and love that she needs so much right now. Please think of her, send her prayers, whatever is your thing. I know she needs it so much right now.

Thanks.